Can a 'meet cute' happen in real life? Tips for finding your person naturally
Pressure to find Mr. or Mrs. Right can be stressful.
Even with more channels today than ever for meeting people, with dating apps, singles meetups and more, it can still be difficult to find someone you click with.
The "meet cute" is a term reserved for cinema and television when two people meet in a charming way for the first time, leading to a romantic story all stemming from when they first locked eyes.
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But can an organic meeting with your forever love happen in the real world, too?
Online dating has become a trendy way to meet people, but it's far from the only approach.
A relationship expert offers tips on how to meet someone in the real world. (iStock)
Of course, you can still find your person by more natural means, but it'll take some work on your part to do so.
Fox News Digital spoke with Jaime Bronstein, a relationship therapist from Illinois, coach, speaker/host of "Love Talk Live" and author of "MAN*ifesting: A Step-By-Step Guide to Attracting the Love That’s Meant For You," about her tips for those trying to find their person naturally.
- Where should you go to meet people naturally?
- How do you make an initial connection with someone? What should you say?
- Is there any truth to finding love when you least expect it?
- A message for those losing hope of love
1. Where should you go to meet people naturally?
The places where you could meet someone are infinite. Bronstein shared with Fox News Digital in a phone interview to not focus too much on where you could meet your specific partner. Instead, think about places where you could meet new people in general, because even making a new friend could eventually lead you to a romantic partner.
"Connect with everybody," Bronstein said. "Whoever you're having a conversation with, it's important to verbalize that you are single. I think a lot of people are shy about it, they're not putting themselves out there, or they think, ‘What are the chances this person is going to know somebody?’"
"People need to think about the fact that they might meet someone, make a new friend and that friend might have a brother or cousin or something," Bronstein continued.
There is an abundance of places where you could meet someone. Take every opportunity you can to potentially be introduced to new people. (iStock)
When brainstorming ways to meet new people, think of things you are passionate about or enjoy doing and find activities that cater to your own interests.
This can lead you to finding more people, maybe even a potential partner, who have similar interests to you. This includes signing up for classes, clubs or joining groups that sound interesting to you.
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You can go to events where you know there will be new people to meet.
"Also, go to fundraisers, go to social events or any type of event where there are going to be a lot of people or even just 20," said Bronstein. "Go to those things, even if you're not in the mood, because once again, you never know who you'll meet there."
Don't count any place out for a potential start to your love story, even the produce section of the grocery store.
"I've been doing my podcast for five or six years and this was the cutest thing. I had this guest on my show, and he was giving advice about where to meet people. I've never forgotten this," Bronstein said.
"He said the produce section at a grocery store because then you know that the person's healthy."
2. How do you make an initial connection with someone? What should you say?
How many times have you been scrolling on your phone while in the checkout line or waiting for your coffee order to be called? Probably a lot.
One of the first steps to meeting people is coming off as someone who is approachable and not occupied with distractions, like your phone.
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"Be approachable and open," Bronstein said. "That means look up when you're walking down the street or when you're in Starbucks and you're in line, don't be closed off, don't be on your phone. When you're in public, show the world that you are a friendly person and you're approachable, so that people can approach you and [you can] approach people."
If you see someone you find attractive, no matter where you are, it doesn't hurt to share a friendly smile and engage in a short verbal exchange.
Most likely, no one is going to come up to you if it looks like you are busy on your phone. (iStock)
"I always encourage all of my clients: If you see somebody who you think is attractive, go up and say hello," Bronstein told Fox News Digital.
"I don't care if that's at a bar, restaurant or anywhere you are, because life is short and why not? You literally have nothing to lose."
Who should go up to who in these situations? Traditionally, a man would ask a woman out on a date, acting more as the pursuer, but that has shifted. It's a shift that is important for girls to be aware of in their journey to finding love.
"Do not assume that he's not interested just because he's not going [up] to you."
"I've been hearing this from guys so much recently, that with the Me Too movement, with feminism going on, with everything, guys are not going up to girls as much because they don't want to be creepy," Bronstein said. "Girls need to know this about guys now. So, that's why, go up to the guy. Do not assume that he's not interested just because he's not going [up] to you."
Making that initial connection is something lots of men and women struggle with. Bronstein gave some prompts you could use, but at the end of the day, she said it really doesn't matter what you say as long as you take the chance and say something.
"You could say the cliché, 'You look familiar,' and literally who cares where that goes after that, because then you start trying to figure out how you know each other," Bronstein said.
Bronstein also noted giving a compliment and commenting about wherever you are as things you could say to make an initial connection with someone.
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"You need to tell yourself that if the person is interested, you could say, 'The sky is blue. Did you know that?' And they will want to talk to you. So really, at the end of the day, it doesn't matter what you say," Bronstein said.
"Don't worry about the outcome [or] how you're going to look. Have the confidence to take that chance because life is short," Bronstein continued. "Life plants these opportunities in front of us. We make a choice. ‘Am I going to take advantage of this opportunity that was just placed in front of my face? Or no, and then regret it later?’ You don't want to do that."
3. Is there any truth to finding love when you least expect it?
For those looking for love or those who have found it, a common piece of advice heard and given is that you'll find love when you least expect it.
Bronstein said these words of wisdom are actually quite powerful ones, if executed properly.
"I think there's a fine line. I think that you don't want to just sit at home and do nothing," Bronstein said. "Do everything that's in your power but don't make yourself crazy about it."
Finding love when you least expect it is a very real and powerful thing, said one expert. (Getty Images)
"If you're too focused on the anxiety and the fear it's not going to happen, then it's not going to happen; versus when you are trusting, you're in this trusting mode, and you are believing that it's going to happen, and you start to be present in your life, instead of fear mode, which is future, fear, anxiety," said Bronstein.
"[When] you start to be present, that is when you're in the flow of life. That is when they say things happen when you least expect it, and there's so much truth to it because you're not having that desperation energy which actually repels what is meant for you."
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"So, it's not just a cliché thing, it's very real," Bronstein said of finding someone when you least expect it. "Think about your life and think about the times that really cool, amazing things happened, all these incredible things, and sometimes they have been surprises, and it's because you weren't too focused on it," Bronstein said.
4. A message for those losing hope of love
Horror story dates, ghosting and long streaks of not dating can all contribute to individuals losing faith in love. These factors can lead people to believe that a romantic happily ever after isn't in the cards for them.
Bronstein provided words of wisdom for those who feel like their hope of finding love is dwindling.
When losing hope in love, go back to why you want a partner. For example, if you have dreamed of getting married and having kids someday, remember that everything you do to find the love of your life brings you one step closer to these goals. (iStock)
"I would say to people, return to your why and this is what I say to my clients. You're feeling overwhelmed, you're feeling burned out, you're feeling like you're losing faith. Go back to your why," Bronstein said.
"I say to people, it's almost like you need to threaten yourself, in a way like you say, 'If I give up, what am I going to get from giving up?' So, go back to your why and get really intentional again about why you're doing this and ultimately what the reward is going to be and bring back that trust."
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Bronstein added that "nothing that is meant for you will pass you by."
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