Ways to cope with Mother's Day after your mom has passed
Mother's Day can be an extremely difficult day for those who have experienced the loss of their mother.
It's important to remember during the week of Mother's Day that everyone handles grief differently.
If it brings you comfort to remember and honor your mother on the day, and tell stories of memories, then you should feel encouraged to do so.
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If you want to avoid the day completely, know that is OK, too.
Below are seven ways to cope with Mother's Day after your mom has passed.
Mother's Day can take an emotional toll if your mom has passed. Here are ways you can cope with the loss on the day. (iStock)
- Give yourself grace
- Make a card/buy flowers
- Avoid social media
- Talk to your friends and family
- Do things that remind you of your mom
- Create a photo album
- Cook her favorite meal with your kids
1. Give yourself grace
On Mother's Day, and every day from her passing, give yourself grace.
Remember that your feelings are valid and you'll want to give yourself space to feel them.
If you don't think you're ready to talk about the passing of your mom, you don’t have to. If you don’t want to acknowledge the day just yet, you don't have to, either.
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On the flip side, if it helps to recall memories, share stories and celebrate her, feel free to do so.
Grieving is a complicated process, and the time you take to acknowledge your grief and find ways to cope should feel right to you.
2. Make a card/buy flowers
It may feel therapeutic to still purchase and write your mom a Mother’s Day card. You may find that writing a card provides comfort.
You can put this card on display in your home or keep it for yourself.
Planting flowers that your mother loved in your own yard can be a great reminder of her as they bloom. (iStock)
You can also celebrate her by purchasing her favorite flowers and placing them on display where you'll pass them often. Then, you will be reminded of her every time you walk by.
Also, consider planting her favorite flowers in your yard.
Mother’s Day is in the spring, which is a great time for planting. Pick up her favorite flower, as a seed or as a starter plant, and watch it grow big and beautiful.
This will give you something in her memory to take care of every day.
3. Avoid social media
It can be tough scrolling through social media and seeing your feed flooded with Mother’s Day messages.
If you know this is going to be troublesome for you, avoid social media on Mother's Day.
You can simply remove the apps to avoid temptation and add them back a couple of days after the holiday.
If you want to avoid seeing Mother's Day posts on social media, delete the apps off your phone for the day. (iStock)
4. Talk to your friends and family
You'll likely recall memories of your mom on Mother's Day with the people that knew her best, whether it be your dad, siblings, her siblings or other family and friends.
If you know it is going to be rough for you to spend the day alone, host a meal in her honor. You can invite siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends and anyone else you hope to spend time with that can bring her back in spirit.
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Take this time to get together with family and revisit everyone's fondest memories of your mom. You might even hear a new story or two from before you were around. Allow tears to be shed and joy and laughter to be shared.
A meal is also the perfect way to celebrate the other important women in your life like your grandmother, aunts, cousins or siblings.
5. Do things that remind you of your mom
Make your way to some of your mom's favorite places.
You can enjoy an activity the two of you used to do together or drink her favorite coffee or tea.
If you have kids of your own, incorporate them into the fun as well.
6. Create a photo album
While we live in a digital world, print photos have become less popular in recent years. That being said, photo albums can be truly beautiful and a wonderful way to soak in a lifetime of memories.
Go through your phone and other devices to look for pictures of your mom. If you have any already printed photos, include those in your album too.
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Once you’ve got all your pictures together, put them in a photo album that you can continue to look through and add to each Mother’s Day.
Make as many albums as you'd like to. Fill them to the edges and include fun sayings she always said, dates, names, etc.
7. Cook her favorite meal with your kids
Cooking a meal your mom used to make for you can bring back a lot of positive memories.
Having your own children make the meal with you can bring a sense of comfort and also allow new traditions to form.
Get the family involved in a homemade dish your mother loved. You can teach your own kids how to make the meal to help her memory live on. (iStock)
While you put the meal together, if you feel comfortable, share some memories with your kids of their grandmother.
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